Bon Voyage Hymen!

We're having a goodbye virginity party this coming Wednesday... a little late for some of us, but better late than never. The plan was born out of the fact that when you lose your virginity there's an overwhelming sense of "what the fuck do I do now?" and the world should really throw you a party for completing such a bizarre task.

So tomorrow at school I get to call Dairy Queen and order a chillabrations cake with the caption "Bon Voyage Hymen". I intend to accuse them of being anti-semetic if they refuse to put it on the cake and claim that my friend Hymen is about to leave for Israel and they are trying to deny him a cake. Hilarious. Jess has said that she can't possibly be in the room with me when I order. It's going to be excellent.