The Fun-Time Centre For Girls

Just for kicks us feminists sit around and laugh at dictionary definitions of woman. Here are some of the favourites that dictionary.com had to offer:

WOMAN

-a wife.
-a sweetheart or paramour; mistress
-a female employee or representative: A woman from the real estate agency called.
-a female person who cleans house, cooks, etc.; housekeeper: The woman will be in to clean today.
-Obsolete. to cause to act or yield like a woman.

-Woman, female, lady are nouns referring to adult human beings who are biologically female; that is, capable of bearing offspring. Woman is the general term. It is neutral, lacking either favorable or unfavorable implication, and is the most commonly used of the three: a wealthy woman; a woman of strong character, of unbridled appetites.
-A female servant or subordinate.
-n 1: an adult female person (as opposed to a man); "the woman kept house while the man hunted"
- a human female who does housework;
-a female person who plays a significant role (wife or mistress or girlfriend) in the life of a particular man; "he was faithful to his woman"

And of course, the always hilarious bible:

woman

was "taken out of man" (Gen. 2:23), and therefore the man has the preeminence. "The head of the woman is the man;" but yet honour is to be shown to the wife, "as unto the weaker vessel" (1 Cor. 11:3, 8, 9; 1 Pet. 3:7). Several women are
mentioned in Scripture as having been endowed with prophetic gifts, as Miriam (Ex. 15:20), Deborah (Judg. 4:4, 5), Huldah (2 Kings 22:14), Noadiah (Neh.6:14), Anna (Luke 2:36, 37), and the daughters of Philip the evangelist (Acts 21:8, 9). Women are forbidden to teach publicly (1 Cor. 14:34, 35; 1 Tim. 2:11,12). Among the Hebrews it devolved upon women to prepare the meals for the household (Gen. 18:6; 2 Sam. 13:8), to attend to the work of spinning (Ex.35:26; Prov. 31:19), and making clothes (1 Sam. 2:19; Prov. 31:21), to bring water from the well (Gen. 24:15; 1 Sam. 9:11), and to care for the flocks (Gen.
29:6; Ex. 2:16). The word "woman," as used in Matt. 15:28, John 2:4 and 20:13,15, implies tenderness and courtesy and not disrespect. Only where revelation is known has woman her due place of honour assigned to her.