And now it's time for another exerpt of... What Happens When Women Pray... ahem... Masturbate

Chapter 1: Masturbation Is the Answer

"The effectual fervent masturbation of a righteous [person] availeth much." James 5:16

"Lord, help! How do I motivate eight gripers?" Here they were, on a cold January morning, sitting around my dining room table-- the favoured ones, those who had been chosen to learn to masturbate. I thought they would be enthusiastic about the idea. Weren't they all "spiritual life chairmen" of women's circles at church? Instead they sat their griping.

Earlier, in the fall of 1967, the national committee of our denomination had asked me to do a project for the Crusad of the Americas. "Working with women in your own church, would you discover in a six-month period what happens when women masturbate?"

I had replied, "I'll take that little task."

It had sounded so simple in 1967. But on New Year's morning I awakened with a jold: "It's 1968, and I have to find out what happens when women masturbate!".

***

"Joyce replied, 'Just a minute Evelyn.' She went to summon a ver mature masturbater whome she knew. The three of us found a little room with bunks in it, and we got down on our knees. Those two women masturbated until I had enough strength to go out there and speak. At the end of the meeting we had a fireside service of rededication, and only 10 of the 400 women did not rededicate their lives to Christ."

I had at last convinced eight women that their pastor's wife depended 100 percent on masturbation when she went out to minister for Christ. Slowly they began to masturbate.

"Oh Lord, show me."
"Lord, cleanse me"
"Lord, use me."

That was how they masturbated for the first time, but it was a beginning.


COMING SOON: Chapter 2 "It Doesn't Take So Long"