No human emotion can be sustained indefinitely.

Monday, July 31, 2006

It's too damn hot for a penguin to be just walkin' around out here.

I spent my entire day doing laundry. We have no dryer so it's an adventure in makeshift clotheslines in my backyard right now. I got it done though, and I did some writing, so I feel satisfied. And tomorrow Steve has the day off work, so we will be sticky together, and I can't really ask for more.

I also got to hold a six day old baby today. Boy howdy that is some tiny. My next door neighbour (who is 26 by the way) just had her third baby. A tiny and adorable boy named Thomas. I was lucky enough to get invited in to hold and snuggle the small human. He is beautiful and has tons of hair. And tiny little finger nails! He sneezed twice while he was in my arms and it's probably the best thing I've experienced all week.

So I have a lot of spare time right now so if anyone needs a movie buddy, or just misses me let me know! My parents are leaving me alone with Ben on Wednesday for a little less than a week, so if anyone wants to come over, let me know. I'm hoping this will go okay, but you never know. I may have to hose down a 15 year old party.

Things on the Shane front are also not great, for those of you keeping tabs. I accidentally saw him on Saturday night and promptly heaved in the alley as soon as I got out of the building. It's a very strange feeling when someone you thought cared about your existance as an aquaintance (at the very least) not only doesn't give a shit, but is also going out of their way to make you feel worthless. The last time this happened was in grade twelve when Ben Zhu told me that I was nothing and that my opinion didn't matter because I was a useless, worthless, waste of a human being. This resulted in my best high school exit from a classroom ever as I stood up, yelled fuck you, and slammed the door so hard I thought the glass might shake loose. It's looking like I might need to do some yelling and swearing at Shane Brown. A taint to the Brown name.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Black Jack

I'm home. And it's my birthday. I have received two e-mails, and no phone calls. Mleh.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

NOTICE

All birthday present purchases for me must be run through Matthew C. Brown to avoid his wrath and anger. It's just good sense people.

10 Days! I am so ready for 20 to be over. It has been a hilariously bad year.

Birthday list additions:

My own copy of Cunt (second edition)
Oral sex

I have my own cabin of 12-14 year olds right now. I'm not in love with them yet, but we'll see. My brother is here and being an ass which makes me worried about coming home, and Shane seems to be able to maintain being a long-distance ass, which also makes with the worrying.

So tired!

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

16 days until my birthday

In case anyone out there is keeping track, it's almost my birthday. The following is a list of stuff that I might like:

Dazed and Confused Criterion Collection
Special Edition Empire Records (with all the added scenes and whatnot)
A Massage
Pretty, fancy (maybe beaded) strings of lights to put around my room


That's all I can really think of right now. I just wanted to make note of it so I didn't forget what to buy in case I don't get them for the old B-day. There's no party or anything planned as of yet, but my birthday is Friday July 28th, and if people are up for something, I'd like to do something. When does clerks 2 come out? Maybe a movie and a drink after? Maybe something hilarious and extravagant? Maybe sitting around in a park because I'll be in woods-withdrawal? Let me know, because I get home the day before and last minute planning sucks (for me). I guess the point is, something will be happening on that Friday night, so if you want to spend my birthday with me, keep it open!

oww

I had a weird and twisted dream last night where this girl I know was going down on me and when I was right about to come she punched me as hard as she could directly in the clit and I passed out from the pain. What's that about?

Monday, July 10, 2006

Sex with Bex?

I just found out that I'm to be the official sex advice columnist for the University of Guelph's alternative newspaper The Peak! I'm so excited! Now I just need a clever name and an e-mail address. Sex in the Goo-loph just isn't quite right. So please comment and leave me any and every idea for titles and a catchy name for myself!

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Pirate! Pirate! Walk me off the plank!

Last night the entire camp staff dressed as pirates and went to see Dead Man's Chest. It has become a tradition of sorts, because when the first one came out we all invaded the Owen Sound Galaxy cinema dressed as pirates and wielding wooden swords (which were promptly taken away at the door... both times. We were loud and rowdy and piraty and it was so much fun. During the half-hour wait we sang pirate songs, yelled yarr at each other and the audience, took lots of group pictures and (my favourite) did a pirate wave where we yelled "yarr" when we stood up. There were 35 of us and we took up just over two rows. The audience did not know what to make of us, but it's one of those things they won't forget.

The movie was through and through a go-between. But it went-between well. I'm definitely looking forward to the third. I'm hoping it will go back to a bit of the cleverness that was lacking in the writing this time around. The beginning nearly turned me off of the entire film. Why are we still putting out movies portraying natives as heathenistic canabals? And why are actors still agreeing to play those parts? I don't care that it's a period piece, their representation was totally out of date and offensive. Also, why introduce all kinds of new ethnic crew members just to kill them off? What kind of statement are they trying to make?

The best part of the film according to Jess and I is the almost-kiss scene between Elizabeth and Jack. We were both writhing in our seats. We almost jumped each other it was so damn hot. Oh summertime celibacy.

Hopefully the third film will rely less on the repetition of one-liners and will be strong enough to carry itself through. The experience of seeing Dead Man's Chest was excellent and enjoyable, even if it's not the best stand-alone movie. Yarr.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

"It's just you and me buddy"

Being medic is going well. I started off my day incredibly stressfully because I had to do my morning watch (a story and a prayer and whatnot in front of the whole camp) and I had to deal with a line up of kids who were achy and sick. Fun. I also cleaned out some ears. Also fun. They like me because I'm round and squishy and huggable and maternal. Yeah ovaries.

Last night I had a hilarious moment playing Fruit Basket Upset at games with all the kids. In FBU everyone has a partner and sits in a circle, and the person without a partner stands in the middle and yells out something like "Everyone wearing blue", and if you or you or your partner is wearing blue you have to go into the middle and find new partners. Well, last night this kid Calvyn who's nine and the toughest guy in town stands up in the middle and yells "anyone who's Jewish". So me and my little blonde haired blue-eyed partner run into the middle. I take Calvyn's hand while I'm having a mini panic attack and tell him "It's just you and me buddy!". Meanwhile kids are yelling, "this is a mennonite camp" and "what's Jewish?". It took me a long time to catch my breath. Ah that blissful time before puberty when you don't realize that "Mennonite" isn't a synonym for "overnight". I counselled Calvyn two years ago so I knew he was Jewish. He told me after that he thought it would be a good way to find out if there were any other Jewish kids at camp. Turns out, just me. It was a very strange moment. You could hear the other counsellors getting awkward. Ah well. Such is the life of a Menno-Jew. Or a Jewnonite if you will.

I hope everyone is well in the city! I'm loving being out in the woods!

Sunday, July 02, 2006

Administering Meds to the Tinies

I finished my first day of being medic and I survived! All of the tinies are properly medicated and cared for! Tonight I decorate the infirmary to rake in some fakers!